Can't Sleep??

It's 2:30 in the morning.
In 4hrs and 15 mins I am walking with my friend for our morning exercise.
In 6hrs and 15 mins I am supposed to be at work.
I can't sleep.
I've been in bed for almost 3 hours trying to fall asleep and it is not happening.
I've listened to music, deleted text messages, and looked thru videos and photos on my phone.
But that wasn't my plan at all.

I laid down and within 5 minutes I started thinking about walking in the morning and how, since I was sick this weekend, if I started to not be able to breathe, I would handle that. Then my mind went to when I've been hiking and when I've not been able to breathe because of asthma. Of course, when I'm hiking I always have someone with me to help... but what if I have a panic attack while I can't breathe? Then what is going to happen? How will I get calm enough to breathe when I already can't breathe?! Or what if I have a cold and my face is congested and I have a panic attack or asthma? THEN how will I breathe? My nose will be plugged and my throat will be constricted...
*Sit up and take a deep breath. Calm down. Lay back down in bed.

Next, my mind went to work.
If a child started choking on a piece of candy, do I know what to do? Is the Heimlich started at two fingers above the belly button? I can't remember. *panic* Well, once someone DID choke on a piece of candy - but it was after school and not at recess. Luckily she could talk, so I just talked to her and kept her calm until she could cough it out. But what if it's at recess? Am I going to remember what to do?
From choking, I went to basic first aid. Do I know what to do in such and such situation? What happens if someone literally breaks their head open, is unconscious, and starts throwing up? Well, that is what the "emergency" button on our walkie-talkies at work is for. (It sounds an 'emergency' alarm for 8 seconds, followed by 22 seconds of whoever is on channel being able to hear me and whatever is going on around me without me having to hold the PTT button down. *That's helpful in a stressful situation.) But what if whoever is on the other end doesn't respond? What if they're all busy?
I've had kids pass out, have seizures, get the wind knocked out of them, get bloody noses, lips, knees, and elbows, broken wrists, fingers, and arms, get stung by bees, have concussions, sprained ankles, jammed fingers, and once, someone fell off the monkey bars (like, THE most dangerous piece of playground equipment...), landed on his back and said he couldn't move, so we called the ambulance (after calling his mom - she said call the ambulance). Can I handle all that? Sure. But what if someone isn't breathing? Do I remember CPR? Do I remember how to treat for shock? Then my thoughts returned to choking. *I won't add in here my thoughts about CERT and how it freaks me out to be in the triage area...*

After first aid, I sat up and looked at the clock. About 50 minutes had elapsed since I'd laid down. *Sigh. Oh, look! Because I don't have glasses on or contacts in, the little light on the far side of the wall is so shiny and looks really big. Oh! and when I look at it and blink, there are bubbles and dots that move!! Look with both eyes, both eyes, cover left eye. Blink. Again. Cover right eye. Blink. Again. Both eyes. Blink. (Continue for the next 30 minutes) When my head started hurting from "playing" with the light, I laid down again.
I had a few peaceful minutes, then I was tossing again in bed. Couldn't get comfy. So, I turned on my music play list on my phone - that usually helps me fall asleep, if anything, it'll take my mind off of playground mishaps and CERT worries. Song 1... 2... 3... 4... I'm just singing along in my head. Song 5... makes me think of something that is on my phone, a video. I grab my phone and go to my videos. I watched nearly all of my videos, which, off the top of my head, is 40 minutes worth?? I could be wrong, it may only be 30 minutes. Either way, I watched the videos, then realized I didn't have one that I thought I should, so I go to my text messages and start saving then deleting photos that I'd "locked". I found the video I was looking for, so I saved it to my memory card (along with the other photos), then deleted the old messages from my phone. Song 6... 7... 8... 9... Still singing along. Except that's the end of my play list.

Look at the clock... it's 2:25. *Sigh.
Get out of bed and make a blog post.
Get a drink of water, and back to bed... praying that I fall asleep this time.
Grateful that this does not happen every night.