Goodbye 2008!

Since today is the last day I work, this will be my last post for the next two weeks (unless I can get my computer at home to work correctly and keep me connected to the internet...). What an interesting, trying, and learning year 2008 has been. I look forward to the events of 2009, whatever they may be. I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas season! Thanks for being my friends :) See you in 2009!

Merry Christmas!!!

You know it's getting to be the holidays when you walk into gas stations and they have nothing better to do than advertise ;) However, it is very creative and I thought it was funny, so I took a picture of it... (clear back in November - like the day after Thanksgiving. OH WELL!)
I hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas and I'm sorry if I didn't get a card sent to you... I need to be more prepared next year for massive card mailings ;)

Perfect Day for a Hike!

Last Saturday I went hiking with Becky. We hiked up to Stewart Falls and it was a magnificent day! The trees were colored in greens, and yellows, and some had berries on them. The weather was perfect hiking temperature... it was slightly overcast with a light breeze. We saw some deer, a moth, some other hikers, and two people rappelling down the falls themselves. So much fun! I love hiking!!!

Holiday Diet

The following diet is designed to help you cope with the stress, paranoia, depression and delusion that builds during the holidays...

Breakfast
* 1/2 grapefruit
* 1 slice whole wheat toast
* 8 oz. skim milk

Lunch
* 4 oz. lean broiled chicken breast
* 1 cup steamed spinach
* 1 cup herb tea
* 1 Oreo cookie

Mid-Afternoon snack
* The rest of the Oreos in the package
* 2 pints Rocky Road ice cream, nuts, cherries and whipped cream
* 1 jar hot fudge sauce

Dinner
* 2 loaves garlic bread
* 4 cans or 1 large pitcher of Coke
* 1 large sausage, mushroom and cheese pizza
* 3 Snickers bars

Late-Evening news
*Entire frozen Sara Lee cheesecake (eaten directly from freezer)

RULES FOR THIS DIET:

* If you eat something and no one sees you eat it, it has no calories.

* If you drink a diet soda with a candy bar, the calories in the candy bar are canceled out by the diet soda.

* When you eat with someone else, calories don't count if you do not eat more than they do.
* Food used for medicinal purposes NEVER count, such as hot chocolate, brandy, toast and Sara Lee Cheesecake.

* If you fatten up everyone else around then you look thinner.

* Movie related foods do not have additional calories because they are part of the entertainment package and not part of one's personal fuel. Examples: Milk Duds, buttered popcorn, Junior Mints, Red Hots, Tootsie Rolls.

* Cookie pieces contain no calories. The process of breaking causes calorie leakage.

* Things licked off knives and spoons have no calories if you are in the process of preparing something.

What's The Point?

I keep my keys on a lanyard, in my jacket/coat/or pants pocket. It has always been this way and will continue to be this way. In case of an emergency (i.e. I lock my keys in my vehicle), I have a spare key in my purse, and another one at home. Twice now, (once a couple months ago and more recently, last night) I have locked my keys in my truck, with my purse sitting inside the cab as well. I have to laugh at my stupidity, I don't get upset - it's my own fault. I think it's funny when I do it, and luckily, both times it's happened, I have been close enough to home that I was able to walk home or get a ride to get my other, other spare key. Both times now, I have set my keys on the seat to grab something else (instead of putting them back in my pocket), and unintentionally locked the door (I don't even remember locking it last night).
So, the point of having two spare keys when I keep locking one of them in my truck? I haven't figured that out yet, but if I get ideas I'll be sure to get it posted :) But I do recommend keeping a couple spare vehicle (house) keys around just in case of emergency... even leaving one with someone else is a great idea!

Mental Health Hotline

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.

If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, please try your call again in a few minutes.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.

Silly Kids

Kids make me laugh. They have their days when they are mean to each other and can be little royal pains, but sometimes, they are just too funny and random. Since Monday, there have been random kids (who I just put together today are all in the same class) who come up to me and say or do something silly then run away. I watch them as they huddle with other kids and talk about their success. They turn to look at me and by that time I am just laughing, that makes them laugh, which makes me laugh more.
Outside of "bad days", I do love my job and being able to interact with the kids on a day to day basis. Most of them are ok with me, some of them like me a lot, and others (the ones who get in trouble a lot) wouldn't mind if I got fired or didn't come back to work tomorrow. Some day, the kids in that last group will realize my role at the school and will learn to appreciate what I've tried to teach them. :)
Hooray for happy times and great kids!!

Einstein Quote of the Day

Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited, whereas imagination embraces the entire world, stimulating progress, giving birth to evolution.

On my computer I get a new quote from Einstein every day. This is the quote for today. The first time I read it, I agreed but as I was typing it, I read it differently... which made me think. Depending on what the situation is, knowledge could be just as important as imagination. For instance, if you were trapped in a fire, knowledge would tell you (hopefully) how best to get out and survive; but if you didn't know how to get out and used your imagination to find a way to keep you safe... well, it sounded better in my head :) Although I do suppose that it would be because of somebody else's imagination that we would have the knowledge to get out of that fire in the first place. Hmmm.
Chances are, Einstein was hinting toward a much deeper level of understanding than what I can comprehend anyway, so I'll just keep thinking about it.
Feel free to leave your comments or thoughts on this quote.

What The?

This is definitely one of the strangest phenomenon that has happened on the playground all year... Someone (I think older than elementary age) put the end of this jump rope into the swing link. This task must have been challenging, because I tried to put the other end of the jump rope in the other side of the swing and could not get it. I felt like I was trying to put a square peg in a round hole - a very complex puzzle.
The jump rope was wedged in there tight enough that it would not budge any way I tried to move it. I finally had to cut the rope, and pull the swing over to one of the bars to 'pound' the handle out of the link. I then put the string back through the handle and the class who lost their jump rope was able to get it back.

Christmas Carols

As we near the Christmas season, let us not forget those wonderful Christmas songs for those of us who fall under the following 'mentally challenged' categories:

1- Schizophrenia --- Do You Hear What I Hear?

2- Multiple Personality Disorder --- We Three Kings Disoriented Are

3- Dementia --- I Think I'll Be Home for Christmas

4- Narcissistic --- Hark the Herald Angels Sing About Me

5- Manic --- Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and...

6- Paranoid --- Santa Claus is Coming to Town to Get Me

7- Borderline Personality Disorder --- Thoughts of Roasting on an Open Fire

8- Personality Disorder --- You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

9- Attention Deficit Disorder --- Silent Night, Holy oooh look at the froggy! Can I have a chocolate? Why is France so far away?

10- Obsessive Compulsive Disorder --- Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells....

I Could Survive!

You Are 65% Likely to Survive Another Great Depression

Even though you may not be expecting the worst, you're the type of person who prepares for the worst. You live a relatively modest life. You don't overspend, and you aren't very materialistic. You are also quite self sufficient and independent. You have many useful skills. You can take care of yourself and those you love... which is crucial to surviving another Great Depression.

Could You Survive Another Great Depression?